its one of those f-ing days

Ok, My poopy woopy sister asked a good question at my last entry- where is the F word? Afterall, most agree its one of the most versatile word ever invented. So I did a little reseach.

Note: For the sake of minors, and other people who get offended easily and all that, who read my site I've replaced THE word- as far possible- with the letter "F". For the more frequent users of the word, you'd naturally expand it in your head anyways.


Origins of the F word:
There appears to be many variants of how the F word originated.

1. The lingustic argument (I personally find this the most logical)
The best guess is that the F word comes from the Middle English fucken, to strike, move quickly, penetrate, from the German ficken, meaning approximately the same thing. A related word may be the Middle Dutch fokken, to strike, copulate with. The American Heritage Dictionary says its first known occurrence in English literature was in the satirical poem "Flen, Flyss" (c.1500), where it was not only disguised as a Latin word but encrypted — gxddbov — which has been deciphered as fuccant, pseudo-Latin.

2. The royal argument
In ancient England a person could not have sex unless you had consent of the King (unless you were in the Royal Family). When anyone wanted to have a baby, they got consent of the King, the King gave them a placard that they hung on their door while they were having sex. The placard had F*** (Fornication Under Consent of the King) on it.

3. The legal argument
It was said that police in Victorian London used to write on prostitutes' charge sheets: "For Unlawful Carnal Knowledge" and became abbreviated.


The F-lexibility
I obviously didn't come up with this. Now, there is actually an international best-seller book called the F-word that charts the origins and evolution of popular slangs and stuff. Now, people, ligusitic research and more have shown that the F word has defied lingusitical compartmentalisation. That is to say, it is an adverb, adjective, noun, pronoun and all that all at the same time.

Grammatical Flexibility
It can be used as a verb both transitive (he F her)
-as intransitive (she was F by him).
-a active verb (he really gives a F),
-a passive verb (she really doesn't give a F),
-an adverb (she is F-ing interested in him) and
-a noun (she is a fine F).
-an adjective (she is F-ing beautiful).

Usage Flexibility
Greetings- "How the F are you?"
Fraud- "I was F by the McDonalds Drive Through."
Dismay- "Oh, F it."
Trouble- "Well, I guess I'm F-ed again."
Aggression- "F you!!!"
Disgust- "F me!!!"
Confusion- "What the F....?"
Diffuclty- "I don't understand this F-ing thing."
Despair- "F-ed again."
Incompetence- "He F up everything."
Displeasure- "What the F is going on?"
Lost- "Where the F are we?"
Disbelief-"Unbe-F-inglievable!!!"
Retaliation "Up your F-ing ass!!!"
Pain- "F ! that hurt."
Pleasure- "Oooooooh F"
Surprise- "F-ing hell what was that?"
Hate- "You F!"
Disappointment- "That's not F-ing fair."
A poker hand- "A Royal F."
Denial- "I didn't F-ing do it."
Perplexity- "I know F all about it."
Apathy- "Who gives a F."
Resignation-"Oh F it."
Suspicion- "Who the F are you?"
Panic- "Let's get the F out of here!"
Directions- "F off over there."
Ambiguity "I'm not so F-ing sure."
Agreement- "AbsoF-inglutely."
Refusal- "Oh you can F right off."
Pissed off- "F"


Hollywood and the F-actor
Below- and I actually found this on the Wikipedia site- are the list of top 20 films listed by F-word/min.

1 The Devil's Rejects (5.60)
2 Born on the Fourth of July (3.37)
3 Nil by Mouth (3.67)
4 Casino (2.37)
5 Martin Lawrence Live: Runteldat (3.07)
6 Another Day in Paradise (3.24)
7 Summer of Sam (2.29)
8 Twin Town (3.23)
9 Ken Loach's Sweet Sixteen (2.95)
10 Narc (2.83)
11 The Big Lebowski (2.4)
12 Tigerland (2.76)
13 Fubar (3.60)
14 Made (2.91)
15 Pulp Fiction (1.76)
16 Reservoir Dogs (2.55)
17 Dead Presidents (2.08)
18 Goodfellas (1.70)
19 The Boondock Saints (2.24)
20 Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back (2.19)


The F-ology
Now, there are many site what discusses the origins, usage, evolution and even trans-cultural and cross-cultural usuage and derivatives of the F word. I mean, you can't seriously beleive that this english version is the end all and be all of it, though I have to admit it the F word is possibly the most easily recognizable of words. Go to Timbuktoo or Galapagos island or Mars and say "F" they'd so know what you're saying.

You guys can go check the following pages out for more reading:

1. http://www.answers.com/topic/fuck
2. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fuck
3. The F-word by Jesse Sheildlower (Ed) and Ross MacDonald (Illustrator)