the long road

The Road Less Traveled
by Kit McCallum

How often we must bear the challenges of life;
The endless roller coaster between happiness and sorrow;
The constant ups and downs of daily strife.
And always the question remains .... why?

Life is not an easy road for most;
It twists and turns with many forks in the road,
Although always, and inevitably, we are given a choice ...

Do we turn to the right ... or the left?
Do we take the high road ... or the low road?
Do we take the easy path ... or the difficult one?

Decisions are not easy for those struggling for direction ...
And sometimes the many choices and signs become overwhelming.

While standing at a crossroads in life,
The urge is to take the most comfortable path;
The road with least resistance ...
The shortest or most traveled route.

And yet, if we've been down that comfortable road before;
Have gleaned its lessons in life, and learned from our experiences;

Do we yet again follow the known?
Or does our destiny lie in another direction?

The fear of the road less traveled is tangible and all too real;
It manifests itself in many ways,
And tends to cloud the issues that might otherwise be clear.

It is in these times of confusion,
That we must seek peace and solitude;

Time to contemplate on our life,
Our experiences and our choices past;
Time to look back, and reflect on what we have learned
Without fear or confusion.

For only each of us knows our own personal thoughts;
Our unique past and personal history;
The experiences that brought us to the crossroads we now face.

We can always learn a small degree from others experiences,
And yet ... no one person can walk in our shoes,
Others know not, the trials and tribulations faced in private ...

For each is individual ... unique ... and personal.

And that is why ... while standing at a crossroads,
Only "we" can formulate the decision for ourselves;
The true direction that lies within;
The choices we must deliberate on with clarity and wisdom.

For it is only through personal reflection,
That we can now choose our destiny;
... Our next adventure;
... And the future we will embrace

caterpillar advice

A duo of birthdays at home and matters with friends led me to buy some flowers these past few days. As usual, I went to my standard wholesale florist at Jalan Kayu, but instead of walking out with my usual purchase of geberas or roses, I ended up purchasing some gorgeous- wait for it...- pink chrysanthemum. Of course I know they are merely dyed pink (there was a purple variety which looked too gruesome for human visual consumption so I passed on them) but, still. They were bimbotically pretty, so I bought them. As per usual, each flower was carefully wrapped in paper so when I got home I gleefully unwrapped them, washed them, trimmed their leaves- ok, plucked the leaves- and wrapped them into two, what I consider, not-bad-looking bouquets. Complete with ribbon and all.

That was when the problem began. One one flower, I noticed petals kept falling off. I put it down to normal "nature" wear and tear and left it. A while later, actually, after lunch, I came back to more fallen petals on the floor. I figured I had simply caught a defective flower and cleared the petal debris and went about my way. Later that night, lo and behold, yet more petals fell out. This time, the flower in question was already half bald so I had to remove it from the bundle (you never really appreciate how many petals a chrysanthemum actually has until something like that happens).

Then I saw it. As I was clearing out the petals from the balding flower I saw a utterly fat, icky, gross caterpillar nestled in the heart of the flower steadily nibbling away. At my flower no less. Oh, how content was the fat bugger. How utterly gluttony was the grumptious ickydoodledag. Ah! What satisfaction when I flushed it away.

I suppose life's like that sometimes. Something so beautiful on the outside hides a beast within that slowly, but surely destroys it from within to without. It's hard- harder than anyone can ever tell- to gauge the heart of a man by the face that he shows to the world. But over time, as the petals fall away, as the debris is cleared, as the unpreventable stripping power of time wins out... we see what truly hides inside, what lies beneathe, what there really is.

The caterpillar in Alice in wonderland got the question right: Who are you? Really.

a measure of life

May's the 3rd of my friends to post this, so I finally got down to doing it. I'm a sucker for these quiz-quiz things. My JC classmates and I used to be huge Tickle.com fans- we once had a sleep over that basically entailed taking these quizes and playing mahjong. It was frivolous fun, I say. We still do silly stuff (ala the last post) but we only live once.


Things to do before you die

[01] I have read a lot of books.
[02] I have been on some sort of varsity team. (debates)
[03] I have run more than 2 miles without stopping. (some stupid mock marathon in SCGS netball days)
[] I have been to Canada.
[04] I have been to Europe.
[05] I have watched cartoons for hours. (x-men mainly, back to back)
[06] I have tripped UP the stairs.
[07] I have fallen down an entire flight of stairs.
[] I have been snowboarding/skiing.
[08] I have played ping pong. (I was a deplorable student)
[09] I swam in the ocean. (hated it)
[] I have been on a whale watch.
[10] I have seen fireworks.
[11] I have seen a shooting star.
[12] I have seen a meteor shower.
[13] I have almost drowned. (Tasmania, overly huge waves)
[14] I have been so embarrassed I wanted to disappear.
[15] I have listened to one CD over and over and over again.
[16] I have had stitches.
[] I have had frostbite.
[] have licked a frozen pole and got stuck there.
[17] I have stayed up till 2 doing homework/projects.
[18] I currently have a job.
[19] I have been ice skating.
[20] I have been rollerblading.
[21] I have fallen flat on my face. (so tak glam!)
[22] I have tripped over my own two feet.
[23] I have been in a fist fight. (don’t ask, she pushed first)
[24] I have played videogames for more than 3 hours straight. (embarrassingly, puzzle bubble)
[25] I have watched the power rangers. (I like the pink one)
[26] I attend Church regularly.
[27] I have played truth or dare.
[28] I have already had my 16th birthday.
[29] I have already had my 17th birthday.
[30] I've called someone stupid. (Do I get extra points if I called many people stupid?)
[31] I've been in a verbal argument.
[32] I've cried in school.
[33] I've played basketball on a team.
[] I've played baseball on a team.
[34] I've played foosball on a team. (Dawn & I vs other church guys, we kicked ass)
[35] I've played soccer on a team. (the girlie kind)
[36] I've done cheerleading on a team. (May calls me a former member of the cheerleader and jock club.)
[] I've played softball on a team.
[37] I've played volleyball on a team.
[] I've played tennis on a team.
[38] I've been on a track or cross country team.
[39] I've been swimming more than 20 times in my life.
[] I've bungee jumped. (my life’s too precious to leave to suspended bands)
[40] I've climbed a rock wall. (and scratched myself silly, PUS)
[41] I've lost more than $20.
[42] I've called myself an idiot. (still do often enough)
[43] I've called someone else an idiot. (ditto)
[44] I've cried myself to sleep.
[45] I've had (or have) pets.
[] I've owned a spice girls CD.
[46] I've owned a britney spears CD. (the one with the Lucky song, sigh)
[47] I've owned an N*Sync CD. (the byebyebye one. It was subliminal, not my fault)
[48] I've owned a backstreet boys CD. (don’t even go there…)
[] I've mooned someone. ( I considered it though…)
[49] I have sworn at someone of authority before. (Rapster would know all about it…)
[50] I've been in the newspaper.
[51] I've been on TV. (live too!)
[] I've been to Hawaii.
[52] I've eaten sushi.
[53] I've been on the other side of a waterfall. (some waterfall in Malaysia)
[54] I've watched all of the Lord of the Rings movies.
[55] I've watched all the Harry Potter movies. (multiple times over….)
[56] I've watched all of the Rocky movies. (occupational hazard)
[57] I've watched the 3 stooges. (didn’t like them)
[58] I've watched "Newlyweds" Nick & Jessica.
[59] I've watched Looney Tunes. (but I like anamaniacs better)
[] I've been stuffed into a locker/I have stuffed others into lockers.
[60] I've been called a geek.
[61] I've studied hard for a test and got a bad grade.
[62] I've not studied at all for a test and aced it.
[63] I've hugged my mom within the past 24 hrs.
[64] I've hugged my dad within the past 24 hours.
[65] I've met a celebrity/music artist.
[66] I've written poetry.
[] I've been arrested.
[67] I've been attracted to someone much older than me.
[68] I've been tickled till I've cried.
[69] I've tickled someone else until they cried.
[70] I've had/have siblings.
[71] I've been to a rock concert. (pearl jam baby!!)
[72] I've listened to classical music and enjoyed it.
[73] I've been in a play.
[74] I've cried in front of my friends.
[75] I've read a book longer than 1,000 pages. (some drama mama samurai book)
[] I've played Halo 2. (what’s that?)
[76] I've freaked out over a sports game. (racing mainly)
[] I've been to Alaska.
[77] I've been to China.
[] I've been to Spain.
[78] I've been to Japan.
[79] I've had a fight with someone on AIM/ICQ/MSN.
[80] I've had a fight with someone face-to-face.
[81] I've had serious conversations on any IM.
[82] I've forgiven someone who has done something wrong to me. (forgiving and forgetting are two separate issues)
[83] I've been forgiven.
[84] I've screamed at a scary movie. (Hideaway; its some satanic show man)
[85] I've cried at a chick flick. (my friend john calls me a weakling..sigh)
[86] I've watched a lot of action movies. (my preferred genre)
[87] I've screamed at the top of my lungs. (roller coaster rides?)
[] I've been to a rap concert.
[] I've been to a hip hop concert.
[88] I've lived in more than 2 houses.
[89] I've driven on the highway/been on the highway.
[90] I've driven more than 40 miles in a day/been in a car that went more than 40 miles in a day.
[91] I've been in a car accident.
[] I've done drugs.
[92] I've been homesick.
[93] I've thrown up.
[94] I've puked on someone. (Fion, I’m sorry…)
[95] I've been horseback riding. (mich: have we ever!)
[96] I've spoken my mind in public. (GE Forum 2006, right after Chiam See Tong!)
[97] I've proved someone wrong.
[98] I've been proven wrong by someone.
[] I've broken a leg.
[] I've broken an arm.
[99] I've fallen off a swing.
[100] I've swung on a swing for more than 30 minutes straight
[101] I've watched Winnie the Pooh movies. (I like tigger, sue me)
[102] I've forgotten my backpack when I've gone to school.
[103] I've lost my backpack.
[] I've come close to dying.
[104] I've seen someone die. (great grandmother, totally unreal)
[105] I've known someone who has died.
[106] I've wanted to be an actor/actress at some point.
[107] I've done modeling. (when I was little, for Konica and Macdonalds)
[108] I've forgotten to brush my teeth some mornings. (I’m not a morning person ok?)
[109] I've taken something/someone for granted.
[110] I've realized how good my life is.
[111] I've counted my blessings.
[112] I've made fun of a classmate.
[113] I've been asked out by someone and I said no.
[114] I've slapped someone in the face. (I don’t know his name, but he was a sleazy bastard with his hands in the wrong places. I did good damage. J)
[115] I've been skateboarding. (and snake boarding too!)
[116] I've been backstabbed by someone I thought was a friend.
[117] I've lied to someone to their face.
[118] I've told a little white lie.
[119] I've taken a day off from school just so I don't go insane. (its called pontang.)
[120] I've fainted. (After giving blood in uni, my dad has banned me since)
[121] I've had an argument with someone about whether cheerleading is a sport or not. (sigh…. See no. 36)
[122] I've pushed someone into a pool.
[123] I've been pushed into a pool.
[124] I've been/am in love. (ah, the bane.)

the antisocial initiative

Michelle and I decided that as we got older we have become less and less willing to make new friends. Don't get me wrong, we are perfectly fine with meeting new people but are simply less willing to make the extra effort it takes to turn an aquaintance into a friend. If it happens, it happens; but we find it hard to get our innately antisocial natures to step up to the plate. We decided, it might be better that way- needless to say, safer for the wider world as well- considering how bizzarely quirky we each are and how academically bimbotic we get together. A case in point: we actually almost emptied out our make up kits at the supper table in a bid to compare cosmetics. (I must thank Pat, Ava and the unfortunate couple who sat next to us for putting up wit our incessant giggling, wild exclamations and intermittent squeals of excitement.

It was a good night. Thank God for good friends.

In any case, it was good to finally be able to nail down the Queen Bee of Antisocialism after two ardous years of futile SMSes and non-answered phone calls. Shan, welcome back to the fold babe. Missed ya.

flying solo

I don't know about you but I've been finding it hard to keep track of time lately; like time just zips by so very quickly that I can hardly keep up.

I checked my calendar today ( I'm not particularly good with time usually so checking up on dates and stuff is "big" for me, ok?) and, to my great shock, I realised that almost half the 2006 year is over already. Where did the last five months go? Did someone speed up the clock and forgot to inform me? Or did the earth decide to spin slightly quicker on her weidly tilted axis? Maybe that's why my stomache's been queasy lately, must be all that cosmic movement. Or perhaps, I'm caught in some strange time warp where the usual rubrics of time and her dimensions simply don't apply.

Was talking to a close friend about this earlier and we've concluded that this strange time phenomenon is just in my reality. She assures me that time is moving mighty slow for her (I put it down to her hating her job, but that's just my take on things) and many of her friends. So we concluded that its cos I've been up to my eyeballs with work, having had to fly solo on too many things; which is great for learning, personal growth and full of all sorts of rah-rah-you-can-do-it kind of things, but is not very good on the stomach (I have a stomach condition brought about by stress), the skin (I get ezema when things get hectic) and the psyche (like I need to get any more insane).

But you know what? I'm really, finally, enjoying myself. Like truly happy.

Maybe I'm just a masochist.

love language

The Five Love Languages

My primary love language is probably
Physical Touch
with a secondary love language being
Quality Time.

Complete set of results

Physical Touch:		12
Quality Time:		8
Words of Affirmation:		5
Acts of Service:		4
Receiving Gifts:		1

Information

Unhappiness in relationships, according to Dr. Gary Chapman, is often due to the fact that we speak different love languages. Sometimes we don't understand our partner's requirements, or even our own. We all have a "love tank" that needs to be filled in order for us to express love to others, but there are different means by which our tank can be filled, and there are different ways that we can express love to others.

Take the quiz

10 things some people need to

10 things some people really need to:

1. Get over themselves
2. Move on with life
3. Snap out of it
4. Face the music
5. Eat humble pie
6. Stop feeling sorry for themselves
7. Watch what they say
8. Get real
9. 'Fess up
10. Be wary

how dumb is this?

On a tag which I found on a Marks & Spencer dress:
"In the interest of safety, it is advisable to keep your child away from fire and flames."

9 faces: the answer

Ok, for those of you that can't find all 9....





All 9... remember the woman and baby counts as two....

8 things I learnt in the last 48 hours

1. I need to really reconsider decisions I've made.
2. I'm not very happy with some people right now.
3. I need to stop being nice about some things.
4. I truly, really, desperately, need a break.
5. There are con artists and then there are CONARTISTS.
6. I'm getting tired of empty promises, seriously.
7. I miss academia and the tutelage of politics
8. There is nothing a good bitch fest cannot fix.

GE 2006

Considering my area was part of the hotly contested Cheng San GRC two elections back, I was duly excited when I finally turned 21 in the last elections thinking I'd get to vote in the last GE. My place got subsumed into the Ang Mo Kio GRC and it was a walk over. Given how I was in the heart of my university forays in the fields of politics, you can imagine I was duly disapponted.

When talk of GE 2006 came about, I was interested, as most PS students/alumni are but pretty much resigned to the fact that I wouldn't get to vote again given the size, strength, repute of the Ang Mo Kio PAP team. I was, of course, downright jealous of my friends who knew for sure they could vote. Jia Biao (DJ at FM95.8) had many a conversations/ interviews with me and he, proabably of all (other than my parents) knew how much I wanted my maiden foray to the ballot box.

I finally DID get the chance to vote and though its not clear, this is a picture of my polling card which I'd probably keep given I won't know if I'd get a chance to vote again in the next few elections. Then again, I'd be moving to my new house in a year's time....

took me a while and loads of help

There are supposed to be 9 hidden faces in the picture above.
Can you spot them? It took me a long time and darn alot of help before I finally got them all... And yes, the baby counts as a face.

Have fun!